We Are Young

My driving test. Well... that didn't go well. I felt so prepared, finally, after all that fretting and worrying about failing. I drove around beforehand, pretty confident. After the long wait time and car check, I was finally ready to get going with the test, BUT I never left the DMV; I auto-failed because of examiner intervention... I pulled up to the stop sign, ready to go. I waited for the cars to turn and cars to pass, then I took my foot off the brake pedal, BUT some driver comes speeding down the lane and the examiner goes STOP! "to prevent an accident from occurring." Sigh. Oh well, going to be even more cautious 2nd time around - in 2 weeks!!

Yesterday, one of my best friends, Devika, and her boyfriend came by my house and asked me if I wanted to go out for lunch. YAY FOR SPONTANEITY! <3 We went out to IHOP for breakfast food lunch :D I also had the first day of our two day varsity tennis tryouts...

Today, Devika came by to straighten my hair. Then, I had senior portraits at school. Lots of people don't like taking pictures or dressing up. Many of our class just went in for the yearbook picture - in then out, asap. Me? I guess I'm a bit of an oddball; I love dressing up, and taking pictures is actually pretty fun, especially if its going to be studio quality x] Then, I quickly changed to get to the second day of tennis tryouts. The results are supposed to be emailed out tonight by our coach, but they're still not here!! I'm nervous!!

Oh. Also today, I was singing quite a bit x] To what? Why how about I show you?

Mockingjay and Lighters

Technically, today is no longer today. It was yesterday. Why am I still up at this hour? Oh, maybe because I spent all day reading the amazing final book of the Hunger Games Series: Mockingjay - Suzanne Collins. Our school's wonderful library technician had let me check out the book even though school hasn't officially started yet; dang, I am such a bookworm. "Today," aka technical yesterday, was registration for me: it's official! I am now a senior! My how time flies... I was talking to my best friend since 3rd grade... It has been years and years, yet it seems like a few days ago that we met. We still sound very much so like kids the way we talk to each other really; if you were to actually listen in on one of our conversations, you'd never think we were 17 (But why on Earth would you do that? Creep.) I also had a conversation with several of my other friends, both in my grade, and outside of my grade today; I got and gave lots of hugs, too. On top of that, there was my conversation with Mr. Kovac, our library technician, who is quite funny and honestly, one of my favorite staff members; he's just amazing. I also talked a bit with Mrs. Erickson, my beloved 9th grade English teacher, who has retired as of the end of the last school year, but was back to teach the little newbies at orientation. This is the second time I've gone to see her during this little orientation week session, but that's not too much for one of my closest teachers. She is absolutely inspiring.
Back to the topic of registration, though. It was split into several stations as always; all the stations went by pretty quickly and smoothly, except for one - we were stuck in that line for almost the entire time we were there for the whole registration!! Then, there was the station for taking pictures for our school IDs. I had to borrow my guy friend's jacket because apparently my tank top with pretty wide straps was still too revealing and inappropriate. This other girl had long sleeves but the shoulder area was exposed by slits and they made her pull her sleeves up. OBVIOUSLY. Shoulders are just so darn SCANDALOUS!!
Overall, not a bad day. Saw a lot of my friends, some of which I haven't seen at all this summer, some not quite enough, and those who I'll never get sick of ;D I spent practically my entire day reading for pleasure. Which is, wouldn't you know it, pleasurable. But, honestly, I love to read for leisure, and I don't seem to get enough time for that anymore. I also went on another night run, listening to the sound of my footsteps and taking in the night air and sky is exhilarating and feels like freedom! Ah, so free.
But reality calls. I still have summer homework to complete and school is impending. I am up at 12:36 AM at the moment typing away at this blog post and I have to be ready and at school to play tennis at 7:00 AM. I haven't completely processed that I am to be a senior and I'll have college applications due soon, then off to college soon after that! My oh my. Let's do this thing!

Song of the Day (on repeat):

I am Butterfly

Feeling so much more like myself again these past couple days!! It's the best feeling. I am feeling so much more productive than I have for a while. I've picked up my college search again and started on my brag package as well as started looking at the supplement questions for the private colleges on the common app. I still need to get a move on summer homework, though. THAT is a bit of an issue; I've STARTED, but that's not quite good enough... I really need to get that DONE. Soon. I still have some time for college applications and such, but summer homework is going to be due soon! Leave it to me to be all topsy turvy... I also need to get all my stuff moved downstairs! I was supposed to move my room from upstairs to downstairs forever ago, but I've only succeeded in moving down my books, magazines, yearbooks, trophies, and closet... all this other stuff needs to sprout feet and go downstairs! Yea... wishful thinking. I know that's not going to happen; get going Vanessa! Yes, I talk to myself sometimes. Problem?

I'm not 100% sure what's gotten me to feel so much more like myself lately, but I do know that it's probably at least partially to do with talking to and hanging out with amazing, remarkable people. I spent a few days of this summer talking to and going places with my best friend/brother, Jeffrey. I spent some time with some of my friends that I hadn't seen in a while, Patrick and Timmy. I went out to the park with my little sister, one of my best friends, her little sister, and some of our sister's friends. I haven't seen this girl (Devika) in so long; we don't always get the chance to see each other or talk, but we always pick up as if we saw each other the other day; THAT is how close we are. We stuck around the park after the little ones left for home, helping out with the concert at the park... enjoying the rock music all the while. I met some people from Devika's school who happened to be around for the concert. I've gone running at night, which is the best time of the day, either by myself, with my little brother or sister tagging along on their bikes, and/or with Ryan, who I met through Devika that day. My sister thinks we're quite strange, probably because we are: during our runs we have random sounding questions. For example: our story of a pillow, who lived a long life then exploded into a mess a feathers. BLOOD! VIOLENCE! FEATHERS!! A feather floats out an open window and we follow its travel across the world until it is placed into a hat. Yankee Doodle's hat to be exact. Then, we follow its journey over the world in a whole new experience upon Yankee Doodle's head and as it is passed down from person to person. Ah... what a fulfilled life for a little feather. Yes, we're quirky. Actually, quite a lot of my friends are which is why I love them. A few days ago, I was at school still after my math class with no food nor money with me and hours to go left at school. I walked my friend/twin sister back to her house and she gave me some snackage to take with me. Back at school, I sat myself down on a bench, ready to nibble away at this food and start up on math homework, only to be greeted by our wonderful school registrar, Mrs. Burgner. She invited me into her office to sit and work in the air conditioning rather than take the sun's beating. I have not talked to Mrs. Burgner much prior to this day, but sitting there, we held a nice conversation about multiple things. We talked for about an hour or so before I realized I had a missed call from my friend Sumesh. My phone had been on silent from class and I hadn't bothered to change it back, so I called him back. Turns out he and our friend, Alyssa, had been at school looking for me, but couldn't find me, so they drove off to the mall without me. They asked me if I wanted them to come back since I was still at school. I said it was alright and they could just hang out at the mall until Speech and Debate camp when I would see them anyway. I was totally fine because Mrs. Burgner is quite wonderful company, and I was actually getting math homework done! She soon offered me a Crunch bar. YAY CHOCOLATE! Then, Sumesh and Alyssa showed up at school because they just didn't want to leave me there alone; what considerate friends [: To be even more considerate, they had brought chili bbq fries from the Potato Corner and liters of soda. I went from having absolutely no food to quite a lot. Ah, how spoiled I am. Then, there's Speech and Debate. We had our mock tournament the day before. It was amazing as always. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Speech and Debate tournaments: the people, the new ideas, the atmosphere, the competition, everything. I always get so excited. I had a ton of fun debating with my partner, Ronald, and performing my dual interpretation with my partner, Sumesh. And it turns out we did pretty well, too! We ended up winning our debate round and placing first in our interpretation round.

-EDIT- I also rewatched Beetlejuice and Aladdin today, watched the Phineas and Ferb movie with my littler brother, played on the Wii with him, and had Mexican food for dinner. I also finished answer two out of many supplement questions for my college apps and about half of my literary term flashcards for English summer homework. That doesn't sound like much, but its the little things that count. -END EDIT-

I think what it is is that laughter, smiles, and a good attitude is simply contagious. And you feel more productive and simply right when happier. I've been laughing and smiling a lot with these people because they're either so easy to talk to or just have that way of making me happier; or they're simply so jovial themselves. One of the best is laughing with my sister. We don't always get along, but when we do, we cannot be matched. Last night for example, we were singing and dancing like weirdos in my room and couldn't stop laughing. We were laughing even more on our run/bike ride a couple nights ago - so much, in fact, we were drawing a bit too much attention to ourselves. I laughed so much - while running - that I actually lost my breath. How glorious it feels to feel like myself again. How lifting it feels to know who I am. I am Vanessa. I am Butterfly. (What does that mean? Have you not caught on to this reoccurring theme? ;P)

Butterfly: A Sign for Renewal, Rebirth, and Change

It still hasn't completely hit me yet: summer is coming rapidly to a close. I don't want to say end per se, because it's simply a beginning. There has been so much filled into this summer that I don't want to forget:
I had a wonderful roadtrip around Arizona, Utah, and Vegas with my family, my mom's best friend, and two of her kids.
I met many new people through summer tennis camp and speech and debate camp.
I got closer to some of my previous friends.
I realized more than ever how special the people in my life are.
I had some spontaneous hang outs.
I was assistant chef in creating a feast for a picnic in the park with my friends.
I went to the beach and several pool parties.
I beasted at Twister and charades with my friends.
I went to my first real concert with my sister: Usher!
I hung out at the park with my sister, one of my best friends, her sister, and our sister's friends.
I volunteered.
I saw a rock concert held at the park.
I have been going running; beating personal bests and feeling amazing about it.
Who knows what tomorrow will hold?
For me tomorrow should be ton loads of fun: MOCK TOURNAMENT for speech and debate. Boy am I a nerd or what? It's okay; I've found a place for myself within our school and speech and debate is definitely that place.
For more tomorrows to come: I'm going to be a senior!!! I can hardly believe it! (WHO WHO? ONE TWO! CLASS OF 2012!) I'm not sure if I'm ready for all this yet, but whether or not I am, it's coming. Hello Senior Sunrise, College Apps, Senior Luau, Senior Prom, Senior Presentations, Senior Sunset, Graduation, Grad Night, and every amazing thing in between.

Often times, when I'm out and about or simply reclined pensively, a butterfly crosses my path, fluttering along; sometimes one comes about and circles me. This always brings a smile to my face. It makes me think about how things will constantly change, but change isn't always bad. It's a sign to me that everything will turn out okay and things happen for a reason.

One day during the last school year, I wrote a poem called Butterfly Wings and read it in English class; as I was walking to my next class during passing period, this beautiful monarch butterfly fly up and circled around me several times before flying off into the blue of the sky.

I am Vanessa, Greek for butterfly. And I will be butterfly: a sign for renewal, rebirth, and change. I will be butterfly - fluttering off free and liberated to a new place and new life - traveling the wonders the world has to offer.